20 weird car names from past & present: The ridiculous to the sublime

If there’s one thing we like, it’s when cars get a bit daft. Enter – 20 of the weirdest, wildest and wackiest car names that actual genuine cars have ever been named.

Trawling the depths of the internet for the bizarre things humans get up to is one of our top hobbies. And humans really do get up to some proper odd things.

However, we have a bone to pick with car manufacturers.

We cannot help but feel that in recent years – with some notable exceptions – car names have become a little bit dull. It’s all letters and numbers and nothing overly fun. We like fun! In a world where life can feel all too serious, is it not nice to have a vehicle sat on your driveway with a daft little name?

Shakespeare famously once said a ‘rose by any other name would smell as sweet’, and he’s not wrong. The Kia EV6 would still be the same excellent car we know and love even if it had a name as ridiculous as the contenders down below.

Speaking of which, we promise that all of these cars are real, genuine cars that once existed somewhere in the world (and some of them are still kicking around today). 

After some serious research, we’ve narrowed down the seemingly endless list of cars with silly names into our top 20 favourites for your reading pleasure. 

And some of them are exceedingly daft.

And we could not be happier about it.

1. Daihatsu Naked

Why Naked you ask?

We have no answer. Is the car naked? Are you supposed to drive it naked? Should cars have clothes? Are all the cars on our roads naked? How would a car even wear a pair of trousers? Would it go on the back, covering the boot, or underneath, covering the chassis?

The possibilities are absolutely endless.

2. Hyundai Trajet

It’s like saying ‘tragic’ in a bad French accent and for that alone, we must applaud it.

I dare you not to go around sighing and saying ‘it’s all just so Trajet’ for the rest of the day. I’ve been doing it for weeks now.

Good job Hyundai.

3. Nissan Friend-Me

This one was actually a concept car, unveiled at the 2013 Frankfurt motor show.

Stylised Nissan Friend-ME (which, to us, feels a little desperate, like you’re yelling at someone down the street and asking them to be your friend), it was meant to preview Nissan’s concept of the future, with a social network inspired interior and spec.

It didn’t catch on, unfortunately, but Nissan’s current line-up – especially with the launch of the Nissan Ariya two years ago – is proving that they do still know what they’re doing.

4. Vauxhall Adam

This makes the list for no other reason that it made me cackle with glee for a car to have a human name.

I mean, we all name our cars anyway, right? Jessica Jazz, Pete the Peugeot, Marco (VW) Polo. 

However, those are names we have given to cars with very normal car names. The Honda Jazz, the Peugeot 2008, the Volkswagen Polo. But when it comes to a car being named Adam by the brand?

Astounding. Astonishing. One of the best things I’ve ever learned.

It’s like naming your cat Kevin. It will never not be funny.

5. Mazda Titan Dump

Once again, I simply cannot explain to you why I am sat here giggling. 

You shall simply have to work out for yourself why a vehicle named Titan Dump is so funny.

One more for the class: Titan Dump.

6. Ford Probe

No one wants to be sat in their car thinking about probes.

Nothing good has ever come from something named a probe. Aliens do it, thermometers do it to meat, doctors do it… Probes have their uses, but as a car name?

We’re not entirely sure what Ford was thinking. You won’t be surprised to hear that, after being launched in 1989, the Probe was only around for two generations before never coming back.

7. Isuzu Mysterious Utility Wizard

No, we’re really not making this one up.

Isuzu did actually name a vehicle the Mysterious Utility Wizard. Why? No idea. 

It’s so good though. An absolute contender for the top weird car name. There’s not a lot that could top this one. 

Just imagine explaining to your work colleagues that you’ve bought a Mysterious Utility Wizard. They’d never believe you. In fact, they might even laugh at you. And you wouldn’t even be lying.

8. Mitsubishi Minica Winky

We can’t stop sniggering. We know it is childish. 

But Minica Winky? I don’t think we need to explain that one.

We’ll just sit here and laugh for a bit longer instead.

9. Tarpan Honker

It’s like if you went down to the local pond and let the silliest goose name your car.

‘Hello, Mr. Goose. We have this new car, and we’d love for you to name it for us.’

‘HONK.’

‘Perfect, thank you, sir.’

And thus, the Tarpan Honker was born.

10. Ferrari LaFerrari

Yes, technically in many markets this is just called LaFerrari. Yes, we know that it is the quintessential Ferrari.

But in a world where often the manufacturer and the model name has to be stated, we cannot help but laugh at a car that ends up being called Ferrari LaFerrari.

It’s akin to the classic Boaty McBoatface. You might as well have named it Ferrari McFerrariface. In fact, we would quite like it if Ferrari went the whole hog and did that just for us.

11. ORA Funky Cat

Sadly, it’s been renamed the ORA 03, but the ORA Funky Cat was one of the newer hits on the list, launched in the UK only a couple of years ago.

As quirky as its name suggests, we will never be over the fact that ORA took away the endless pun opportunities for us that the name Funky Cat brought.

You just can’t do that much with 03. It doesn’t lend itself to comedy.

12. Mitsubishi Toppo Guppy

First, we had geese naming cars, and now we have cars named after fish.

Why is it always Mitsubishi? We have no idea. But the Japanese manufacturer is quickly becoming our favourite brand simply for their absolute commitment to the daft bit.

13. Toyota Vellfire

It’s like if Dracula started yapping on about casting his unlucky victims into hellfire.

‘Tonight, I shall not drink your blood, but I will cast you into the VELLFIRE.’

No, it doesn’t make sense to us either. But we do love it.

14. Suzuki Celerio

If we were going to name a car after a vegetable, celery or celeriac (not entirely sure which veg Suzuki took their inspiration from) would not be the first one to spring to mind.

Broccoli, perhaps. A crowd pleaser, and excellent when smothered in cheese. Or Potato. I would very happily drive a car named Potato. 

But Suzuki chose a different path. And for that, we applaud them. It’s a bold move, to be sure.

15. Renault LeCar

See: Ferrari LaFerrari.

Renault The Car. It’s so obvious it’s almost genius. Why has no brand ever done that before?

16. Dodge Ram

This car name is less weird, and more confusing.

Are you dodging, or are you ramming? Are you dodging a ram? Are you ramming a dodge? Is it simply a statement of intent rather than a name? 

We can’t work it out, the name contradicts itself. 

17. Mazda Bongo Friendee

10/10, no notes, nothing else to add.

Bongo Friendee. Just repeat that to yourself several times. Bongo. Friendee.

18. Mustang Cobra

Otherwise known as ‘Horse Snake’.

Quite a terrifying prospect, if you really think about it. Is it a snake sized horse, or a horse sized snake? Or some horrifying combination of a snake and a horse? Or is the snake simply riding on the back of the horse?

We’re not quite sure now. 

19. Daihatsu Applause

The Daihatsu Applause would only be better if actual applause sounded every time you opened the car door, or parked perfectly, or completed a by-the-book manoeuvre.

Alas, it does not.

And we can only assume that’s why it was replaced in 2000. 

20. Kia Bongo III

Can you believe that there is a second car with the name Bongo?

We could barely believe that there was one car with Bongo in its name (there’s a song in there), but there is, in fact, a second. And from a different manufacturer!

The mind boggles. Or Bongos, if you will.

(The name does actually come from Mazda so it does make sense – this little utility truck is based on the Bongo line of vans. And yet, we still have so many questions.)

Unfortunately, there were many, many names that did not make the cut, but gave us a good laugh nevertheless. We have to give some honourable mentions to these five corkers, and leave the rest on the cutting room floor.

It’s a hard job. But one that we really do enjoy.

Weird car names that weren’t quite weird enough to make the official Carparison weird car name list:

• Honda That’s
• Tata Buzzard
• Isuzu Bighorn
• Proton Putra
• Toyota Deliboy